No Easy Day

Existential angst Jen had to confront
A bad day for DC's biggest cunt
Chuck's secure in the E-Ring
Her blog could not do a thing
On to another embarrassing witch hunt

Meanwhile Up in the Attic

The Post's resident crazy old aunt
Typing up her next ludicrous rant
Chuck would be a poor boss
And he favors Hamas!
Her evidence as always is scant

Consanguinity

Jen awoke for the day not well-rested
Couldn't sleep 'cause she was so detested
Quite depressed as she blogged
By regrets she was dogged
And wished her parents had never incested

Still At It

A rabid attack dog of the Right
Jen claims Chuck is an anti-Semite
Anyone with a brain
Knows that Rubin's insane
And on the losing end of this fight

Supply Side

Jen Rubin is not on the fence
And in the face of all evidence
A supply sider she remains
As the few reap the gains
Let the rest scrape by on a few pence

Ayn's Daughter

The former Romney bootlicker in chief
Tends to give Barack Obama some grief
A Randian maker in her mind's eye
Alas only of lie upon lie
She's the epitome of an oxygen thief

Not Her Sons

It's said the Spartan women of old
Forced their warrior sons to be bold
Jen wants your son on his shield
While her boy chases yield
At Goldman where muppets get rolled

Costs

Lies to bolster the neo-con charade
Are recognized as Jen's stock-in-trade
Every war she supports
But she's not at the forts
To see the cost of this foolish crusade

Lamestream Media

From Jen and her friends on the fringe
You're likely to hear the same whinge
Against media bent
They frequently vent
Ignoring the latest Murdochian binge

Dreams of Her Stand-in Fathers

As Jen lies in her bed every night
To rest for tomorrow's web fight
She dreams of Romney and Ryan
With John Boehner cryin
And Marco mounting her in the moonlight

The Defenestration of DC

Jen egged on a mob filled with hate
That sought Chuck to defenestrate
For putting America first
He was labeled the worst
By fools who believe Rumsfeld was first-rate

Puzzled

One wonders why Hiatt was keen
To give Rubin a place to vent spleen
Did she have some good dirt
Was he trying to flirt?!
Hard to fathom with her hideous mien

Motivations

What is the deep wellspring of hate
For this embarrassment to the fourth estate?
Chuck spurned her advance
Plus she still needs a manse
And she's well paid her vengeance to sate

Unguided Cruz Missile

Ted's effort Chuck Hagel to fell
Had the feel of a school show and tell
No time for the army
But damn was he smarmy
Played a poor man's McCarthy quite well

Don't Hassle the Inhofe

There once was a son of the prairie
Harangued by a closeted fairy
On Rubin's lies Jim relied
For Chuck had not stayed on side
Which made the chickenhawk caucus quite wary

Poor Hiatt

All hail the high priestess of drivel
Whose stern look can make Hiatt shrivel
Unencumbered by facts
Pressing smears to the max
It's enough to make Katharine Graham swivel

Imperial Life in Crazy City: Inside Jen Rubin's Head

Rajiv drew a line in the sand
It was clear he did not understand
His employer's odd choice
to give Rubin a voice
When Weigel was suddenly canned

Fountainhead

A fountainhead of bad information
Oft derided in much of the nation
Birchers feed off Jen's chum
Leaving Post colleagues glum
The best argument for improved education

Slouching Towards Gomorrah

Persistence is a virtue they say
But writing screeds against Chuck every day?
It smacks of obsession
And societal regression
That Jen Rubin can do this for pay

Hagee and Hagel

The favorite Jewess of Pastor Hagee
Keen to libel good men for a fee
Claimed that Chuck hates the Jews
But was shocked by the news
That Israelis tend not to agree

Requiem

There once was a proud broadsheet paper
That uncovered a Watergate caper
With ad revenue down
They hired a clown
And their good name vanished to vapor

Next Target?

It seems there's no taming this shrew
Maybe next on the hit list is Lew?
Carrying water for the right
With a knife at the political gunfight
Her defenders are increasingly few

New Media

Jen's hit count made Fred Hiatt swoon
This new talent would sure be a boon
Her Gorgonian face
Did not help the case
For the website they used a cartoon

Neo-Cons

The harridan of northern V-A
Pecks away at her keyboard each day
Hatching schemes with her mates
As Kristol she fellates
Tonight on Hardball she'll bray

Stuck on Chuck

Jen Rubin was in quite a funk
Her blog posts had clearly been bunk
Chuck overcame Inhofe's derision
Hiatt regretted his decision
As the lobby realized it was sunk

Katharine, not Lindsey

What's a witless harpy to do
When her show biz lawyer gig falls through
Write some tripe for the Post
As she torments Graham's ghost
Sold her soul for another page view

Welcome to the blog

I noticed recently that some people had started posting mocking limericks in the comments section of prominent Right Wing Hack Jennifer Rubin's blog on WaPo.  Being a little bored at work, I decided to try my hand at it.  Imagine my surprise when my pithy little poems began to disappear from the comments section (even the ones that weren't bawdy).  Anyway, that inspired me to make my initial foray into blogging.  I'm under no illusion that I've produced great art here, but hopefully a few folks get a chuckle out of my silly little poems.